WE DOH WATCH FACE......... ONLY WAIST

Me here !!!! Well since ah on de dole these days, I have ah considerable amount of time to think about my all consuming passion Carnival .So de other day I was thinking about which body part is de most important to the modern day reveler ..... ... To some it may be the legs, because that is what yuh need to be able wine down to de ground and touch yuh toes, and mind you I have not been able to accomplish that phenomenon since the year 1990 when we were all singing "No no we ent going home" right dey with Tambu ... Or fuh de fellas it may be De Bamsee, since that is what dey love to wine up against on de road ....and thank God after 30 long years ah finally grow one .... Now De Bamsee does play an integral role in de body part line up, however really and truly I think de mostest (yes ah say mostest ) important body part is De Waist /De Waistline or the lack there of ......... Yes papa cause yuh could have the biggest "Fart Pan or Pum Face" once yuh have a Waist like thunder yuh guaranteed to get nuff wine and play on de road (and that goes for both men and women alike ).

So lately there have been a proliferation of songs pertaining to de glorious Waist /Waistline. From Snake oil Waist to Thunder Waist these songs can't help but make you think about your waist or lack there of (an unfortunately I fall into the latter category)...... So yuh know yuh girl is ah intellect and ah always thinking about de next best solution for this thing I call ah body .........Well ah come up with a really good one , drum roll please ........." CORSETING " yuh ent see wrong.... "CORSETING" is de answer to this waist line problem .... So some of you may not know what this entails so I well give you a brief history.......

Way back in the olden days most women desired the perfect waistline. And like many of us today a 19 inch waist was not a god given asset . So what was a woman to do ? That is where the Corseting came in ..... Corsets were used to constrict the waist to de desirable dimensions .... And I ent talking about no Friedricks of Hollywood corset I talking about de real deal . Now this may seem extreme but guess what, nothing to to extreme when it come to being ah Hot Body Gal (in my best Jamaican accent )........

So I make up my mind to try this thing OUT ....Well as I mentioned earlier in the post , I on de dole so I ent have no big set ah money to by no fru fru corset. And I say all yuh need is something to constrict yuh waist ....So see me in G street fabric looking for cloth ...Well I decided on some Army Green Gabardine. Cause yuh know that is some heavy fabric and I fashion my self an army of one ... (They have some nice cloth dey boy, I was looking at some Indian Cotton but then I say one good tie and this big waist will rip whey that cloth )....So I went with De Gabardine ......

Well let me tell you that thing ent easy nah .... After De First Tie!! I start feeling like a market crab on Sunday.... De second Tie!! I start to wheeze ...De Third Tie!! Well that did not happen nah cause I sure I was going to ketch fits on de people ground ......So I just settle for two big ties. Well we will see if this thing work cause like I like tuh say " Pain is Pleasure and Pleasure is Pain" .... So people if yuh see me in ah party not getting on wassy as usual is" De Gabardine "....... If yuh start ah conversation with me and I can't answer cause I short of breath and wheezing is "De Gabardine" ........If yuh see me ketching fits on de dance floor .... Well dat might be a new dance or "De Gabardine" ....... But I ent care cause come February when I have a 20 inch waist yuh well tell meh better ..... Cause like Bunji say "WE DOH WATCH FACE ONLY WAIST "